HE DIDN'T KILL YOUR SON!!!!

I hope you will all forgive me this one chance to really and truly vent, but yesterday was the 15th anniversary of Joshua's death and I thought I was doing ok until I was on my way home from the beach this afternoon, listening to a news radio station and was slammed with the Cindy Sheehan story. She's the Mother of the late Iraq war veteran, Casey Sheehan who was killed in Iraq- she has been camped out near President Bush's Crawford Texas ranch for some time now, demanding an audience with the President. I'm not sure why it triggered the emotional response from me that it did, but I had to pull over and cry for about 10 minutes. But I am honest enough to admit that it was borne out of anger.

I know Mrs. Sheehan will, in all likelyhood, never see this letter, but it will make me feel better to be able to vent about it.

Dear Mrs. Sheehan:

First, let me offer my condolences on your loss. I know the deep ache of losing a son. Yesterday marked the passage of 15 years since my own son, Joshua was killed in a pedestrian vs. automobile accident. However, while I can empathize with the pain, loss and sorrow you must be feeling, I am unable to sympathize with you. Your son was 18, died in a very different way, for a very different reason. Mine was 2 years old. It was a stupid accident.

While I can imagine how deep your sorrow must run, and the pain and anger you feel, I'd like to make one small correction. President Bush did not kill your son.

While you and I may be on vastly different sides of this war, and this presidential administration, and whether we agree or not, it matters little. President Bush did not kill your son.

No, I cannot say that I agree with everything President Bush has done or will do, nor can I say I understand the motivation for going into Iraq. But still, President Bush did not kill your son.

Your son, of his own volition, volunteered to join the United States military. I believe he knew full well at the time of his signing on the dotted line, what this committment to his country may entail. No one sat there with a gun to his head and forced him to sign. President Bush did not force your son to join the military. While your son may not have agreed with the politics of war, he knew full well before joining what this could mean to him.

Mrs. Sheehan, the fact remains, President Bush did not kill your son.

I am not a cold, heartless person who is in favour of war-mongering, the continued occupation or even going into another country in the name of an offensive defense - in order to take the terrorists out before they take us out. And I have two sons, one is almost 16 - just two short years before he could join the military and another who is 12. I also have a daughter, a twin to the almost 16 year old who could very well decide to join the military. And I have my final child on the way. I can only hope and pray that by the time this child is of age, that the world is a far more stable and hopeful place. Should any of my children decide to serve their country, I will try my best to make sure they are fully aware of the committment and possible sacrifice this could mean.

I am by no means ready to give up another child, for ANY reason. I'd lay down my own life if given the chance to spare my children, for any reason. But I know that my children are intelligent and should they make the decision to join the military, it will be with full knowledge of what it means and what may be asked of them. And I will, with every ounce of my being, support their decision - regardless of my own personal politics, regardless of my own feelings about the administration in office or it's politics and policies.

Mrs. Sheehan, I'm not saying or implying that you didn't love or fully support your son. But I think you do his memory a huge disservice, as well as the countless other men and women who continue to serve our country in a war that was not of their making, who will, if called to do so, lay down their lives. I can understand your anger. I've been there. There have been days, well, there still are days when I want to wrap my hands around the neck of man who hit and killed my son. He was driving on a suspended license and without insurance. I have moments when I want nothing more than to watch this man suffer.

But in the end, what purpose would that serve? My own perhaps. But I know that this is something my son would never want. So I choose to honour his memory in other ways.

I will choose to honour your son's memory and be grateful for the sacrifice that he made for our country by saying to you; Thank you for raising a son who had the courage to make a committment and paid the ultimate price for that committment. Because of men like your son, I am hopeful that my children will inherit a world that is one day peaceful and where violence against your fellow man is not the answer.

Mrs. Sheehan, it's my sincere hope that you find some peace and solace in the fact that to many, your son was and will remain, a hero.

Compassionately,

Just Another Mom