So This Is How We Blog....

Hi there! I'm Audrey or also known as; Auds, Audie, Odd, Hey You, Big Mouth, or on an alternate plane of existence, Red. Yeah, long story there. The title of the blog? Well, if my suspicions are correct, it's pretty accurate!

Ok so that's me, the Brit part of the equation is my darling husband, Gareth. Born and raised in Great Britian, Portsmouth to be exact....absolutely charming, teller of corny jokes (oh, and get this, most of them he makes up himself! *rolling eyes* ....Speaking of his eyes, he has the most gorgeous blue eyes a girl could totally lose herself in. Which I've done many times.

How did we meet? Glad you asked.

A long long time ago in a galaxy far far away....oh wait, wrong story. Seriously though, it was a long time ago. I was just shy of 12 and he was about to turn 14. Our schools were both part of a international pen-pal organization. We got paired up. That in itself is pretty amazing because most of the time it was same sex pairings. In the past I'd been matched with PP's in New Zealand, Sweden and Australia...all females.

So, long story short, we kept in touch over all those years. I do recall one argument we had via snail mail letter when we were teens...it wasn't so much an argument as a debate. But I remember thinking; "like he like totally is like wayyyyy stubborn, for sure. Like he's never gonna like ever get anyone to marry him being like totally stubborn like that!" Well the way Gareth sees things, he always maintained that I would eventually get tired of kissing toads and notice he'd been there the entire time. And ya know, he was right! He is the best thing that's ever happened to me. And he waited for me through two truly horrendous marriages, my several cross-country journeys and the myriad of adventures that my career in radio and voice work provided for me. I always hate to admit it, but once upon a time a very wise woman told me something...she said to me; "Audrey, I don't think you're going to be ready for an adult relationship until you are in your mid 30's." And she was right. You know who that wise woman was? My Mom. While I hated her for saying that, at the time, she was right.

And wouldn't you know it, I sometimes open my very own mouth and my Mom jumps out. While ten years ago that would have sent me into severe shock, I'm getting used to it. And I think now that I'm in my mid 30's, I'm more able to admit that ok, yeah she was right about a lot of things way back then. We didn't always see eye to eye and I know I was a right pain in the ass a lot of the time, and spoiled beyond belief, but my Mom is a wise woman and she knows her daughter. And hey. she'd have to be wise, she's an attorney after all.

Ok so back to what I was saying, (I'll try to keep the piss and vinegar to a minimum, and I've no doubt my ex will dig this up and read it, well he doesn't really read much and I can't be bothered to post pictures for him to make it easier to digest) I have been feeling like crap since I got back from the UK a couple of weeks ago. Actually I felt like crap the entire flight back. Had I not been bumped to first class (heaven!) I probably would have felt a lot worse. I've just been telling myself though that it's jet-lag or I have some sort of stomach virus. But then my boobs....oh my god my boobs! Talk about sore. And I can't stand the thought of white chocolate, which for me is big. It's the only chocolate I like. And just the thought of putting a piece in my mouth gags me.

So being that I'm not technically late yet, well not for another week anyhow, I'm going to try and not go out and by a pregnancy test yet. Oh who am I kidding....I'll probably sign off and go get one. Patience is a virtue, one I wasn't blessed with when the Virtue Fairy passed our home when I was little.

If I do buy one, I will however try and wait until Gareth gets here from the UK on the 18th to use it. I soooo can't wait to see him again! He's home this time....the start of home for good!

Ok well I've loads to do and you're eyes are probably crossing.

Nighty nite!